Sunday, February 5, 2023

The old negatives with an actual date

I'm done the old negative project. I've gone through the box of old photos, mainly looking at the negatives with an eye to digitizing them. Let's just say the box was not organized to archival standards. Some photo packets didn't have negatives, some negative were in their little envelop without photo prints. Sometimes the negatives didn't match the prints. Mostly we can't remember when the photos were taken, sometimes not even to the year. There is one photo where I was looking for the negative and haven't found it yet. Maybe there are some additional photo packages in another box.

But there is one sequence of photos where we not only know the date, but the time. It was Jan 5, 1985, in the early afternoon during a chinook, starting about the time my best man didn't show up. Later I learned that was a good thing. He had been tearing apart a car motor with his brother that lived a 5 minute walk away. It wasn't uncommon for him to drop by before or after a visit with his brother. I can just see him driving up, and me telling everyone to get ready, he'll be here in a minute, and have him walk up in filthy jeans and T shirt. 

These are somewhat out of sequence. Clearly I didn't take these photos, and I don't know who did. Thank you. 

1. The moment of truth. Borrowed a best man from the small audience. Yes, we got married at home, spending less than $500 all up.

2. Awaiting the best man. "It's not too late" she whispered. "Maybe it's a sign."





7. Dork alert!


9. Those eyes! And that's with the red eye reduction. I no longer remember what was in the box.


So here we are, 13,910 days, or 38 years 1 month later. Still married. Just proves you don't need an elaborate wedding ceremony for a lasting marriage. I've often thought that it's foolish spending big bucks on a wedding. I mean, anyone can get married, it's no big deal. But anniversaries, make it 10 years, along with kids and job and mortgage stress, that's something to celebrate. 25 years, with kids out of the house and it paid off, party time! This is the sweet spot, something to celebrate and still able to do so. By the time you hit 50 you're just happy to still be around, and from what I can see, will mostly want to go to bed early and avoid the fuss and bother.

Secrets to a long marriage? "Yes dear." 

Which makes me think about other marriages in my family.
Both sets of grandparents married till death, one for sure 50 years, the other would be close to that if not over.
An uncle and aunt, 53 years married till death.
Some cousins near my age recently ticked over 40 years married.
So in spite of all the news about divorce rates, long marriages are still happening. Day by day, day in, day out, making it happen. Of course, some weren't married that long. As the saying goes, it is what it is. Not assigning fault or laying blame. Then there's the whole till death do you part. That's happened too.

It ought to be fairly easy to get married. Lots of times I think we should have to pass a test before being allowed to have children, though I don't have the first idea of how to manage that. 

Marriage is many things. Sometimes it's a love match. Sometimes it's an economic union. In times past it could be part of a peace treaty with a neighbouring kingdom. Lots of people get bent out of shape because two men want to be married, or two women. Fill your boots, I say. As long as you're both consenting adults, have at it.

In fact, I'm open minded enough that if larger groups want to be married, why not? Rest assured, I'm not thinking of the model in some religious communities where some old goat marries so many women they can't keep track of their children. That's wrong. If more than two are getting married, then each is marrying all the others. They all have to be of legal age, consenting, and of sound mind. (There are some who would argue that anyone wanting more than one spouse cannot possibly be in their sound mind, but we'll pass over that.) They need to know who the biological parents of the children are, regardless of how the actual parenting duties are divided. And if they're smart they'll write up rules for division of property and other matrimonial assets before it becomes a problem. That's a good idea for any marriage.

Don't forget, AMA is on! Keep those cards and letters coming. You can email me keith at nucleus dot com, or text, or leave a comment here. Mention at the same time you'd like to be added to the email list, because is there anyone out there that actually likes Facebook?

Of the Day



Film (new)

Film (old) 
All the wedding photos are of course old film. Sebastian, contemplating how life could be better.

1 comment:

  1. Congratulations on your long and I presume mostly pleasant journey. Cheers, Sean


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